The job is difficult this week. I am quick to want more money, more authority, more variety, but none comes and I struggle. At the same time, I want to know as fully as possible the spirit living in and through me. What does it want from me and what does it want for itself?
"... your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, and though they are with you yet they belong not to you."
Can I learn to be with Life as I would be with a child? Extend attention and devotion but leave space in my plans–or drop them altogether–to serve as Life asks? I would not presume to stylize a child, why do I insist on stylizing my life?
It is challenging to think of surrendering my ego’s position, but who am I to know how Life should be? Surrender doesn’t mean I can’t or won’t work for change; it means I embrace radical humbling.
As with a child, I bring to Life what awareness I have and let go.
4 thoughts on “Psalm of surrender”
I chastised an elderly man at Walgreens the other day for not wearing a mask in the store. As it turned out, he did have a mask, but had simply forgotten to pull it up over his mouth and nose. I felt churlish as soon as the words passed my lips. Such is my need for control: it extends even beyond myself to others.
Yet the passages you quote above suggest that our individual needs and desires are superseded by natural laws already in place. What an appealing idea that is, but how difficult it would be for me to be as a child, uncup my hands and release all of my demands and expectations to the wind.
Thanks for your thoughtful comment, Paul. Perhaps it is an idea that goes two directions: receiving Life with some child-like acceptance and, when Life is frustrating and disappointing, extending patience and compassion to it as though to a precious child. Not to be naive or avoid responsible action, but meaningful imagery can mitigate bitterness or hopelessness and help us stay with what we cannot change in a more positive way.
Thanks for your blog, nice to read. Do not stop.
Thank you, Mark. I appreciate the encouragement.